Are You a Professional Dealing With a Horrible Boss? Secrets for Winning - Part 2

This is Part 2 of my previous post providing tips for dealing with a horrible boss. It's not uncommon at some point in your career to have what you would describe as a "horrible boss." Handling them and surviving is an art. In addition to the previous tips you can:


4.  Explore Your Options.  Without taking the time to identify what options you have for dealing with your situation you feel trapped. Feeling trapped can make you think you have only two choices to go or to stay.  With a little exploration, or brainstorming with a coach, friend or mentor, you may be able to discover that there are more choices than you think. Are there options are for getting some relief inside the organization? What internal mechanisms exist for resolving conflicts with your boss or co-workers? Is there someone you can talk to within the organization?  What are the ramifications of speaking up, of keeping quiet?  When speaking up it is essential to use excellent communications skills and to know what you want so you don't make your situation worse. 
5.  Get out.  After exploring all of your options if making a job change or leaving are your only choices, create your path to freedom before you quit. When you've got a lot of work to do it can be hard to find the time to begin or manage a job search campaign but it can be done. You need an organized, strategic, carefully crafted, step-by-step exit strategy. You'll want to stay productive AND achieve your job transition goals. Part of your strategy should be how to leave on the best possible terms.

6.  Get Help. Sometimes it's hard to deal with a horrible boss on your own, especially if you're in a management position and can't discuss things with your colleagues. This is when a coach, mentor or trusted adviser can help you brainstorm and come up with creative strategies to overcome obstacles, find a ray of hope, stay motivated, do something you may not have thought of, or create a winning exit strategy. Coaches like me offer laser coaching sessions that help you zero in on your unique situation to develop a winning strategy to deal with a difficult boss so you can improve your work situation and your life. If I can be of assistance to you feel free to contact me or use my automated calendaring system to schedule a complimentary session.

If you've survived a "horrible boss" and have some tips to share please add your comment below. 

Linda Hardenstein, MPA, PCC, helps professionals and managers who want to improve their careers and build a better life achieve more of what they want through personal achievement coaching and authentic career development. Find out more at her website.

Are You a Professional Dealing With a Horrible Boss? Top 3 Secrets for Winning - Part 1

"My boss is always yelling," said an attorney when listing the primary reasons for wanting to change not only jobs but careers. A friend who overheard this and who works on his own remarked that he couldn't believe things like that happened in "professional" environments. As a veteran of law firm life and someone who has experienced and figured out how to survive and successfully deal with more than one "horrible boss," I let him know it's not that uncommon. This recent article about Horrible Bosses and Poor Leadership in Fast Company confirms it.

There's nothing worse than going to work everyday and facing a horrible boss. It can stifle your productivity, be depressing, debilitating, sabotage your confidence, wipe out your self-esteem and burn you out faster than you can say "I'm outta here!" So how can you outsmart a horrible boss and lessen internal conflict to maintain productivity, stay focused and accomplish your personal and professional achievement goals on the job? Here are 3 tips for dealing with a horrible boss: 

1.  A winning strategy.  Martha's boss was always "holding her back" from developing her skills and wasn't giving her recognition for all that she did. She was tired of being a victim. After analyzing her situation we developed a strategy for Martha to break-out of this pattern by figuring out how her boss could win and she could win too. Martha convinced her joining some organizational committees would be good for both of them. It helped the boss with intel and gave Martha greater exposure and recognition. She was soon noticed and scooped up by a more appreciative boss who saw her value. Working up a winning strategy takes some personal reflection and its helpful if someone who is independent from your situation can help you see opportunities that can better your situation. 

2.  Be willing to shift. We've all heard it a million times and unfortunately it's true -- you can't change someone else you can only change yourself. Be willing to change how you operate or respond to situations to get a different, more positive outcome. To paraphrase Dr. Phil, how is what you're doing now work'en for ya? If what you are doing now was effective you wouldn't be looking for a way out. A willingness to change how you look at things or react is an essential element of a winning strategy.
 
3.  Set limits. Determine how much you're willing to tolerate and set a timeline for making a change. Just the simple act of setting a timeline can give you a feeling of relief. You'll begin to see a spark at the end of a tunnel of what probably feels like a very long, hard traveled road. 


Dealing with a horrible boss on your own isn't easy, especially if you're in a management position, don't have anyone to talk to and can't trust your colleagues. This is when a coach, mentor or trusted adviser can help you by brainstorming creative solutions that overcome obstacles, give you a ray of hope, keep you motivated, or help you make the progress you haven't been able to make on your own. Coaches like me offer long-term and short-term laser sessions focused on your current dilemma so you can zero in and develop a winning strategy to deal with your difficult boss and improve your work situation for a better life. Contact me or use my automated calendaring system to schedule a complimentary session.

Do you have a question you'd like addressed in Part 2 or a tip you'd like to share? Leave your comment below. 

Linda Hardenstein, MPA, PCC, helps professionals and managers who want to improve their work situation and build a better life achieve their goals in work and in life through personal achievement coaching and authentic career development. Find out more at her website. 

Productivity and Work Life Balance - It Can be Done!

Is it possible to be productive without working so hard? Evidently so according to The Business Insider's article on the ability of the French to work shorter hours and produce more. 

Clients who take my Overwhelm Busters® classes learn about a productivity study conducted at a major corporation some years ago. A group of employees were asked to spend an hour of their work day doing absolutely nothing (this down time was in addition to their lunch hour). At the conclusion of the study those who did nothing for an hour a day saw an increase in productivity.

When we give ourselves some down time our brains get an opportunity to process things and come up with creative ideas or solutions to our most pressing problems. Why not take a lesson from the French and give ourselves a break? 

This summer is the perfect time to do your own experiment. Give yourself some well-deserved rest and down time and see how much more you get done. Let me know how it goes by leaving me your comments!

Linda Hardenstein, MPA, PCC, is a personal achievement coach who helps women professionals leverage their high potential, develop authentic careers and make powerful decisions that increase their profitability and effectiveness. Contact her through her website.

 

 

Stressed Out? Five Quick Tips to Help You Chill

It's summer and the living should be easy - right? These days almost everyone is stressed about something -- jobs, money, the economy, health, etc. It takes conscious effort to stay in a peaceful state of mind in today's world.  Here are five tips you can try for chilling out:

1. In her book "99 Things you Wish You Knew Before Stressing Out" Lauren Miller says we begin to stress out when we're feeling unsafe, "I might fail; I might be fired; I might be unseen, unheard, overlooked." She suggests one way to disconnect from insecurity is to connect to what you value most in life. What do you value most in your life? Make a list of your values. Is the way you're living in alignment with your values? If not, this could be one source of stress. 
2. There's nothing like going for a walk and breathing in nature to de-stress one's mind and and ease one's soul.
3. Do you know what your rejuvenator is? Your rejuvenator is something you do that is totally different from who you really are, or who you think you should be in the world. It helps you stay balanced. For example, if you're a straight-laced, suit-wearing professional like an attorney, your rejuvenator might be riding your Harley. If you're someone who works with people all week, like a Realtor or a retail sales clerk, your rejuvenator might be chilling out, reading a book at home alone. Explore what activities rejuvenate you and recognize that "being a slug" could be a good thing -- a necessary component for getting rid of some stress and having a balanced life.
4. If you've participated in my Overwhelm Busters® classes you know about the research that shows our brains can hold only so much information. Taking a break is a great way to de-stress and improve productivity. Getting away from your desk, your project, whatever is consuming you and allowing your mind to "float" may actually give your brain the space it needs to come up with the brilliant or creative solution you've been looking for. 
5. Clearing the clutter from your desk or your room can help you create a less stressful environment. Our environment reflects back to us where we are in our lives. If your environment is out of control it can make you feel that way too. If you're feeling overwhelmed a quick remedy can be stopping and cleaning up your desk. Gaining control of your environment can give you a greater sense of control over your work day and that should alleviate some stress!

I'd love to hear what you think of these tips and what has helped you de-stress at work or in life. Leave me a comment!

To find out more about conquering overwhelm and stress at work, Linda provides personalized strategies for your unique situation. Contact her for a complimentary consultation or check out her Stress Reduction Session Special Offer. 

What?! Step Away to Get More Done?

If you like getting things done it's easy to convince yourself the most productive way to go after it is to sit at your desk, focus, and plow through whatever is on your plate until you are finished. I don't know about you, but I've spent hours chained to my desk due to this mindset. Some of them have been productive and some of them have been down right frustrating! Have you ever noticed that sometimes this technique of too much forcing and too much focus backfires? Every once in awhile what you've got on your plate may be so overwhelming it's hard to decide which step to take first, or how to tackle everything. 

My clients have learned several tips and tricks for moving forward in these situations during my Overwhelm Busters® workshops. One tip seems counterproductive but it works and it can work for you too!  If you're in the overwhelmed mode and find that you're stuck and no matter what you do the flow just isn't there for figuring it all out, rather than wasting more time being frustrated, it may be more productive to take a break. 

Yep, just step away and take a walk outside. Visit another floor in your building. Take an early lunch and browse at a bookstore. Sit outside and read a book. Giving your brain a diversion often allows it to relax. When it's relaxed it is freed up and has the space to creatively problem solve, come up with a new idea, or think of a way to proceed that gives you the "ah-ha" you need to accelerate your productivity.   

It turns out not only can your brain benefit from stepping away from your desk, it's also good for your body.  "Sitting All Day is Worse For You Than You Think,"  a story on NPR's Morning Edition, provides even more reasons to get up and get moving during your work day, whether you're feeling stuck or not!

Have you ever stepped away and found it to be more productive? If so, what did you do to take a break? I'd love your comments!

Burn Out: Beat it Before It Beats You

If you're a high-powered career woman, you know what it takes to stay ahead of the competition -- dedication, focus, a willingness to take everything on, travel, extra hours, maneuvering in a lean and mean environment. I lived this lifestyle. What I didn't realize was, this can be the road to burn out if you're not careful.

For me it was an injury, one day I was on top of my game, the next I was at the bottom of a flight of stairs having fallen after being exhausted from two cross-country business trips. I almost broke my neck. I had plenty of time recuperating to mull over my life. Even though I was successful, I wasn't really happy.  I realized the seductive adrenaline of the rat race was going to have to take a back seat because what I really wanted was to feel like I had a LIFE. My goal became to figure out how to reclaim my life AND maintain my successful career.

If you can relate to feeling burned out, this article Overcoming Burnout, has some great tips. I've worked with many clients to shift them from burn out to balance by looking at their unique situation and coming up with a step-by-step strategy for reclaiming their life without giving up a successful career.
 
For me, the first step in reclaiming my life was the decision to do it differently.  How about you? Have you ever felt burned out? What do you do think is important for dealing with it? I'd love your comments.
Questions? Feel free to contact me.

Overwhelmed at Work? Tips for Asking for Help

If you're feeling overwhelmed at work, you're not alone. My research shows that the majority of professionals I surveyed felt overwhelmed 50 to 75 percent of their work week. 

This New York Times article "It's Not Mount Everest. It's My Workload," provides some tips to keep in mind when you need to ask for help. Some tricks my clients have learned from the Overwhelm Busters® trainings I offer is how take personal leadership by presenting strategies that enhance your reputation and create a win/win for you and for your supervisor. For example, contribute your ideas for solving the problem rather than just asking for help. Maybe a deadline needs to be re-negotiated, or there is a more efficient way to carry out the task at hand. Having a solution ready when you make a request shows you are thinking about results, you're a problem solver, and you have considered others who might be impacted by your request. Frame your request for help as a win/win and the better your chances are for getting your needs met.

Have you ever had to ask a colleague for help? What worked well for getting others to pitch in when you were overwhelmed? I'd love your comments.